A: Negotiate like it's 2009

There is a lot of advice out there about what not to do when negotiating, like don’t show your emotions, or be willing to walk away, but honestly, that’s crap.  I mean really, if you need to do research to learn this, than you are going to need a lot more help than you can find on the internet.  So instead of stating the obvious, I am going to share some tips on what to do when negotiating so you will be on the win side of the win-lose scenario.

The first thing you need to do is be realistic.  You need to figure out if you are really in the position to negotiate versus being in the position to ask because there will be a big difference in your approach.  For instance, I love my Comcast HD Cable TV/DVR recording device.   I love it like Canadians love to quiz Americans about North American geography.  I can try to negotiate with Comcast for six free months at a reduced rate by threatening to cancel my service but when the fact is that I’d rather sell my house than live without cable, I can only ask and try to persuade my sales rep.  Being persuasive is an important life skill but it should not be thought of as negotiating. 

So to start with, you need to figure out if what you really care about is money or not.  If it turns out you have particular taste and money is not the most important thing, read this for advice on persuasion.  If by chance, all you really care about is money, then you are ready to negotiate. 

It's no secret it’s a buyers market.  Thanks to the fact that businesses did a terrible job forecasting how the current economic conditions would affect sales, there has become a surplus in goods (and unfortunately people) in the market place.  Consumers are getting homes, cars and all other sorts of goods for dirt cheap while employers are reaping the benefit of a surplus of qualified employees  by hiring them up at the lowest price possible.

So how do you negotiate in a buyers market?  You only need one thing, patience. 

Now, if you know me, you are probably laughing at loud because I do not have a patient bone in my body.   I, like most Americans, have the patience of a two year old.  I love instant gratification and I hate waiting.  I hate waiting a week for the next episode of Lost.  I hate waiting in line because someone decided to pay by check.   I even hate that you have to wait a year to buy girl scout cookies. In pretty much every situation, I would say there is nothing wrong with wanting the instant gratification you get from living in an Ondemand world.  However, when it comes to negotiations, saving money can easily takes a back seat to instant gratification.  So to be good at it, you have to be willing to invest your time if you want a specific monetary result.

So, when negotiating for more money with your future employer or for a cheaper price on your new car, the only trick you need to know is to kill them with patience.  The party that is more flexible with the amount of time they are willing to put in a deal will have the upper hand.  If you don’t appear rushed, the other person will be unable to pressure you into making bad decisions.  She will start to show you her hand and this is where you can look for ways to exploit her situation to your advantage. 

To put this in practice, here are two examples

1.       Employers only hire new employees because they assume it will help their bottom line.  If you get a job offer, you’ve convinced them you are the best person out there and the company will benefit in some way from you joining the team.  Now you have the upper hand so you can decide what your market value is.  Hiring employees is typically a long expensive process for companies.  It is generally worth it for a company to pay you a little more instead of spending the time to hire someone else.  So never be afraid to ask for more.  No one wants to leave money sitting on the table.  Be patient and you'll be surprised how readily it will be handed over.

2.       Same goes for negotiating purchases.  How long would you be willing to wait to save a $1000?  A dealership will spend hours with you to make an additional $500 profit. If you really care about money, forget hours and think of it more long term.  Make the offer you want and wait until the dealer needs the sale.  Maybe it is a couple of days or a few weeks, but they will call back.  They always do.

Of course there are other things you can do to improve your negotiating skills.  One thing that  comes to mind is that you should never accept 'no' from someone in the position to say 'yes'.  Also, concessions should be two ways.  If you give in, make sure the other party gives up something too.  But honestly, you don’t need me to tell you this.  You were smart enough to read this blog, so you are smart enough to be a good negotiator.  You just need to give yourself more time.